hello from the 10th dimension of busy-ness

i just got out of the suburban oasis up on orchard lake in farmington. it's probably one of the most overwhelming places ever and now especially [next to of course somerset mall now] - every chain store in creation and existence ever and now [feels like it], THERE, on that fucking road. old navy rubs shoulders with the gap. tj maxx nestled near marshall's. trader joe's across the street from whole foods. brother, sister, parent, cousin stores know no distance as boundary. they're all just stuffed right on that road, lining up that fucking thing.

so if you send a person to the suburban oasis, they're gonna return a little crazy.

two questions:

1) are internet crushes real crushes? if they're at least semi-plausible, should we act upon them?

2) ever know anyone who got sticks and coal for xmas? my cousin jimmy did when we were little. i can't imagine him every doing anything that atrocious. totally totally heartless.

ps. my two favorite xmas songs for your pleasure/leisure/loving coming up tomorrow and friday!