birds and both blackness

supposedly it was/is hotter in chicago than here in detroit, but even after spending two full days outside in the beating-the-fuck-out-of-you chicago summer sun, my house is decidedly more unbearable. even with a box fan in close proximity blowing full-blast. absolutely miserable, no contest. big misery. and you know, misery hates company. speaking of hate, i suffered from a big-time spell of it this weekend, so much hate. so much so perhaps it elicited misery [and hate..?] for my traveling companions. a day in chicago and my love for even its street names wiped away my hate like a much-needed talking-to. or perhaps it was the bartender at the secret squirrel. damn. truly the sweetest, most friendly and sincere woman--let alone bartender at neighborhood hidden dive--i've encountered. that helps. the festival was hot and oscillated between bearable and unbearable. two days of using the porta-pottie with more frequency than ever. two days marked most certainly by social observances. big-time.

after i finished this post, i lost a bunch of it. misery, again. hey, misery hates company. ok? all i remember is that i wrote something about being far too self-indulgent writing here, having hate and losing it. making some new friends and getting drunk, over and again. something about bringing out the fall music commencing on august first. about loving the hideout and being way-excited about the touch and go party in september. and something about thinking about switching back to high-school-style: paper, pencil and privacy.

does misery love the company of the miserable? probably not.